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Hotel Del Rey Costa Rica Closing for Good?

May 19, 2020 by Admin Leave a Comment

There have been rumor of  a change of plans in the operations of San Jose, Costa Rica’s largest house of ill repute for many years.  Legitimate sources tell me that this time around, and probably with a little assist to the COVID-19 pandemic, the rumors are in fact true.  Their website is offline, and people are talking.  So today, I give my homage to a place I’ve had many great times.  The Hotel Del Rey will not re-open in the same format.  For those of you who know about this place, here’s a trip down memory lane.  If you don’t know of this gem, let me tell you a little story about perhaps the most iconic pink hotel in the entire world.

The History of the Del Rey Hotel in Costa Rica

You can’t miss this big pink hotel, one of the tallest buildings in San Jose (which isn’t saying much) and located at 1st Ave & 9th St, San Jose, nearby Avenida Central, a pedestrian walkway.

hotel del rey

Search the web for Hotel Del Rey Costa Rica and you’ll run into many stories that range from unbelievably fun, to incredibly sad.  Any time you mix sex, booze, drugs, gambling, and legal prostitution, and throw them under one roof where rooms are for rent, well, just imagine what can happen.  Let’s go a step further with it, and add to the mix that dating back forty years or more, this place was the biggest example of life hacking for sexually active men who were looking for hot, horny, cheap women that were looking to make a quick buck. Long before the secret was out and Internet Forums and Costa Rica sex guides, blogs, and heck, even me, came along to share information with others, those who visited Costa Rica as a single male traveler knew just what the deal was.  Cheap women, cheaper booze, and a place that was better than even Las Vegas itself.  The best part was that for most people, especially those of us who are in South Florida, this little piece of heaven is much closer and affordable to travel to than Las Vegas for sex.

Many early goers would cite that the place was much more peaceful and easy going before the Internet came and started alerting everyone to the life hack that was Costa Rica hookers.  They would agree that the prices were more fair, the women’s attitudes better, and the scene much more laid back.  With sex tourism rising in popularity and and a booming economy in Costa Rica, this led to rising prices, and with a surge in demand, the leverage that was once to be had started vanishing every decade.

This guy used a hidden camera and got footage of the hotel and some of the women. (Not my footage.)

My first visit was 1999, and that puts me in the OG category of men who know about this spot.  The men who go into the 1980’s are starting to pass away or lose their ability to travel to Costa Rica, and this was recently cited in a board discussion on the popular Costa Rica forum, CostaRicaTicas.com.  At one time, this was among the most trafficked websites in Costa Rica, and now, it’s pace of loyal posters who flock to the site is at a snail’s pace.  You can sign up and without paying you can read the general section and see some nice salutes from men who have honored guys who have passed away over the years.  Legends such as the late great Don Gordo, all the way to polarizing figures like Cuba Dave Strecker, are all openly discussed, honored, and slanted on this site.  It’s a mecca for information, and in past years, it was THE only place to find information on what was going on in the country for single men.

As the 2000’s came and the rise of the Hotel Del Rey became something out of a fairy tale, there were always rumors of it changing hands.  $28 million, $30 million, even $50 million were openly thrown out there by regulars, bartenders, and local lawyers who always seemed to be in the know of what the situation of this booming hotel, sportsbook, poker room, casino, restaurant, and oh, let’s not forget, hooker friendly hang out was.  The stories would circulate from the bar area to the message boards faster than you’d get your wallet snatched if you left it in plain site on a Friday night, but none of that happened.  The hotel was always the place that “Big John” owned, a man who seemed to be respected by many and close with few.  (Although every big shot tourist with a bar tab loved to brag about knowing everyone there, from the security, to the bartenders, to the owners, etc.)

However, by the time the economy started to fall in 2008, so did the quality of not only the customers that would come and frequent the Del Rey, but also the quality of women who would show up to work there and make an honest living in the legal area of prostitution.  The working girls seemed to be aging fast, and new blood never came in to bring down the average age.  Sure, there were still diamonds in the rough, but the country made it more difficult for foreign women to enter, meaning the Dominicans, Nicaraguans, Colombians, Venezuelans, and odd Europeans started dwindling in numbers.  The once smoking hot bartenders stayed the same, or worse – aged, while the Key Largo Bar, directly across the street, started to slow down, and eventually, up until my last visit last year, was a ghost town.

Anyone who visited in the early 2000’s and enjoyed what the Blue Marlin Bar and Hotel Del Rey offered didn’t enjoy it in a way they once did, and simply visited it for nostalgia and friendships.  Judging by what I read on message boards, I’ll certainly get some hate mail for that comment and feedback suggesting otherwise, but I think I can speak for the vast majority of people when I say the talent went downhill and every little loss that happened there added up over time.  Even hot bartenders leaving would put a dent in business, with many of them becoming keen to the situation and looking for greener pastures, often taking their customers with ability to rack up big bar tabs with them.  The crowd got a bit more local, and the women more sparse, but of course, like any adult playground that offered so much, there was always a party of some sort to be had at the Del Rey.

Hotel Del Rey Reviews

The best part about this place is that some people who didn’t know “how it worked” posted reviews on TripAdvisor.  They are pure gold!

hotel del rey review

  • Link to More Reviews

Blue Marlin Bar Memories Over The Years

I’ve seen a lot, and heard a lot. I have seen global celebrities at the Blue Marlin bar, the centerpiece of the Hotel Del Rey and home of the famous “gauntlet.”  This is where in the earlier years the hotel was crowded with women and during busy nights, men making rounds through the gauntlet would get groped, solicited, and eye-fucked beyond anyone’s wildest imagination.  I’m not one to dime out celebrities, so I won’t, but I’m not talking about C or even B-listers.  Some serious people came through here and saw the shit show that was the best pick up bar in San Jose.  Heck the best pick up bar the country has ever seen, and that’s not a diss on the Cocal Hotel in Jaco, which currently stands to continue to lead the country in sex tourism for the foreseeable future.  The Del Rey, in it’s best days, were beyond describable.  You never knew who you would run into, or what you would see, at the iconic Hotel Del Rey, and especially at the Blue Marlin Bar.

Everything from friendships made, to fights commenced, to prostitutes arguing over men so hard that it resulted in a Royal Rumble of sorts, this destination, located in the heart of the Gringo Gulch of Costa Rica, offered it all.  In it’s best years, you could walk across the street to their sister bar and play music and pool at the Monkey Bar.  After that, you could visit the New York Bar and listen to live music by the Gringo Stars.  You could head next door to the Colonial Casino and gamble in a new environment that didn’t allow unaccompanied women in the casino area, or you could go to the always entertaining Horseshoe Casino, where they were never afraid to offer you up a good time.

And if you had the power to stay up late, the Key Largo had live music, dancing, and four bar areas that offered a great environment to catch a buzz.

Other things that happened around the Gringo Gulch back then was the abundance of offshore bookies frolicking around Costa Rica of all statuses, The “Brothers” ponzi scheme and other offshore frauds, and of course a huge real estate boom that was country-wide.  Everyone wanted to get a piece of Costa Rica.

In 2020, the Colonial was still there.  The Key Largo, on life support.  The New York Bar and Horseshoe have been gone for many years, and the Monkey Bar is now a bakery of sorts.  There is still a hard core crew supporting the American bar and hotel, the Sportsmen’s Lodge, a well run operation just down the street past Barrio Amon.

While you will still see plenty of crack cocaine, homelessness, and dodgy characters, this area of San Jose Centro is clearly changing.  While the rumors are that the Hotel Del Rey closing has led to renovations and speculation that the environment will be without women, and will be something of a business hotel, I’m going on a limb and saying that nothing will ever have the success that the famous Del Rey Hotel had in that space.

From an aesthetics standpoint, the place is a pink, Vegas-esque rundown hotel that can only be used for something dodgy.  Without the hotel there, certainly none of the other businesses in the area that cater to the tourist population will be able to survive. I hope I’m wrong, as they all have great operations, especially Chubb’s Bar.  The one establishment that could really benefit from all of this is the Sportsmen’s Lodge, which could use some more space due to this, but let’s see how it all plays out.

Here’s to the memories at one of the greatest watering hole’s in Latin America.  I’ll miss the Del Rey and all of it’s grit, grime, and sleaziness.

If you’ve been to the Del Rey and Blue Marlin, please share your memories by leaving a comment below! 

 

 

Filed Under: Prostitution

7 Rules for Relationships for Poly People

April 27, 2020 by Admin Leave a Comment

Does monogamy sound like the perfect fit for me? I’m not 100% sure anymore, now that I’m happily divorced and rocking the Casual Sex lifestyle.

After taking a closer look at my dating history, I see that most of my relationships and the stipulations involved in them were dictated by fear. I love relationships and I wanted relationship security very badly. I felt that the security in a relationship meant that I was loved, valuable, and worthy of receiving love. But internally I’ve had my doubts about whether or not I deserve these things. Then again, when I date outside of the normal monogamous relationship, I do feel worthy of those feelings.

Not too long ago, I decided to try polyamorous dating to see if I was a good fit for the lifestyle. Now that I’m experimenting, I do not necessarily know where I fit as far as labels are concerned. I don’t even know how to behave and I lack the words to say on dates from time to time.

Are there certain rules that need to be followed? Are there certain boundaries that I cannot cross? After speaking with some amazing non-monogamous folks that live the polyamory lifestyle, they provided some exciting answers that I think you’ll benefit from.

7 Relationship Rules That Poly People Live By

  1. Be Open and Honest about Being Poly

No matter what, when engaging with a new sexual partner you should always let them know upfront that you are poly. Why? It gives them a chance to back out in case they aren’t familiar with or comfortable with your lifestyle.

Or they may want to end up with an exclusive monogamous relationship in the future and since you’re poly that isn’t going to happen. You’ll also be able to better gauge how a person handles their relationship to exclusivity, sex, and where a potential relationship might go.

Giving consent means agreeing to a certain behavior of a sexual nature, and not agreeing to this behavior in context. Poly people have a much more informed and broader type of consent; as well you should expect it. This is good because polyamorous people are open and upfront about the people they are sleeping with. Other supposed “monogamous” people often lie and say they are single, only for you to find out that they are in a relationship later on.

  1. Always Tell Your Partners the Truth

Total honesty is the one rule that you should keep with your main partner if you prefer polyamory. While you do not necessarily need to check in with them immediately after experiencing a sexual encounter, you should share with them about the experience at some point.

Letting your partner know the truth about these encounters and trusting that your partner is doing the same is amazing. You won’t lose sleep at night wondering whether or not your partner is seeing somebody else. You don’t have to worry about her or him when they are out on dates. You can create and develop a lasting friendship with your partner as well as a romantic relationship.

Some thoughts to keep to yourself: finding another person attractive, lack of closure from a previous partner, and anything that could potentially hurt them.

  1. Put in Hard Work on Your Primary Relationship and Your Other Relationships Equally As Well

Everyone benefits when you’re present and focused on your secondary relationships. These relationships take work and you need to check in with your partner regularly. This stuff might not seem sexy, but it’s important because this is much more than just a casual relationship. Your secondary partners need to feel completely comfortable within this relationship structure.

Some people believe that if they have a primary partner, they aren’t required to be accountable or compassionate with the others. This is not even close to the truth as many poly people will tell you. This community focuses on creating intentional relationships with multiple partners and everyone is important.

  1. Adding a New Partner Won’t Resolve Your Primary Relationship Issues

Polyamorous relationships are meant to be exploratory. They aren’t supposed to be therapeutic. They aren’t designed to fix the issues in your primary relationship. Some couples believe that adding more partners will help repair a broken relationship, but this is far from the truth. In fact, it can often create even more damage to the primary relationship since you may lean on one of your new partners for emotional stimulation and sexual release.

If your relationship isn’t thriving, adding new partners will not fill the gaps. You should understand this if you are new to polyamorous relationships. Adding new partners is about creating a new and different connection with another person. You add partners in an effort to enrich your life and the life of your new partner, not attempt to fix a broken primary relationship.

  1. Do Not Be Afraid to Share Your Feelings

Self-awareness is important when you are in a polyamorous relationship. You only have so much time, and you need to allocate it in a way that works for everyone, but especially a primary partner. If it seems like you are being left out, do not hesitate to speak up about it.

You’ll feel incredibly empowered when you have the ability to speak up and share your feelings about the things that you are aware of taking place. Some people might believe that you are even leaving yourself open to abuse and neglect. While it may feel this way at times, speaking up and letting your partner know that you’re feeling neglected will solve the problem.

  1. Make Sure You Have Clear Boundaries Established

Having clear boundaries is very important in a polyamorous relationship. As an example, you may decide to only spend intimate time with your primary partner in the master bedroom. This area is off-limits to other secondary partners at all times if you feel that this is necessary. Or you may have other boundaries that you decide to set.

If you don’t have or currently live with a partner, this may not be an issue for you at this time. But at the same time, you’re definitely going to want your own personal space, so this is important to consider when you finally do change your living situation.

  1. Regular STI Testing Is Important

Because of the additional partners that you and your main partner have sexual interactions with, it’s important to regularly get tested for STIs to protect everyone involved. Make sure you get them at least once a month or more if you think it’s necessary.

Most people think that having multiple partners is dirty and unkind. Regular monthly testing makes the situation a lot safer and you’ll feel a lot better knowing that everyone is free of STIs. Plus, you should care about your health and the health of all the partners in the polyamorous relationship. It’s the best way to make sure everyone remains healthy, safe, and loved.

Filed Under: Relationship

8 Things to Understand Prior to Beginning a Consensual Non-Monogamous Relationship

April 26, 2020 by Admin Leave a Comment

Most people consider monogamy the default model for relationships. They look at it as the gold standard and the perfect way to achieve bliss as a couple. But things are different now and times are beginning to change.

Consensual nonmonogamous relationships are receiving more interest now than ever before. There are many TV shows including Polyamory: Married & Dating, Unicornland, and You Me Her, that dominate the television airwaves.

Even more telling, the sex columnist named Dan Savage recently coined the term monogamish, which is a fun way of saying consensual non-monogamy.

At this time, it is estimated that 3% to 7% of the couples in North America are currently in some type of consensual nonmonogamous relationship.

The terms polyamorous, nonmonogamous, and consensual non-monogamy all have different meanings for different people. For some, CNM (consensual non-monogamy) regards open sexual relationships with knowing partners in a completely transparent fashion. On the other hand, polyamory is different because it involves an emotional and real commitment to multiple partners, and it consists of closeness and genuine love.

I have practiced polyamory and non-monogamy for many years and it’s taken a while to come up with the right words to describe these preferences. In the past five years, I’ve fully adapted a polyamorous and nonmonogamous lifestyle and it’s provided greater relationship satisfaction and even more happiness.

I am fully invested in communicating, respecting, and trusting my partners. I feel a deep sense of love for whoever I feel like loving, and I can love them for as long as I choose in my own way. I meet my emotional and physical needs and feel 100% satisfied. I also feel blessed to enjoy love and experiences brought on by relationship flexibility. My romantic life is brimming with excitement and I’m incredibly happy for this opportunity.

Starting a Consensual Nonmonogamous Relationship

Are you considering exploring the world of CNM? Learn about eight important things to understand before starting a consensual nonmonogamous relationship.

  1. CNM Relationships Thrive on a Solid Foundation

Are you in a stable primary relationship? This is critical to the success of consensual nonmonogamous relationships because adding more partners creates bigger levels of complexity. There also needs to be a tremendous amount of trust in this relationship setting.

Entering a CNM as a couple, with the intent to save the relationship, will likely end up being a huge blunder. The relationship will most likely fall apart. The most successful CMN relationships thrive when the partners communicate effectively and feel tremendous trust, acceptance, and love toward one another.

  1. Agreements in the Relationship Should Be Negotiated Upfront

There are experts in CNM relationships that believe it’s best to cover all potential scenarios in a written agreement before beginning a relationship. But other relationship experts feel this approach is fruitless because there are limitless possibilities for things to go wrong. Instead of having a loving and committed and trusting relationship, the relationship is founded on a legal agreement, which isn’t very good for anyone.

But it’s also important to decide about certain aspects of the relationship upfront. As an example, you may want to know things like, “Are certain activities potentially off-limits?” Or information like, “Should your partner share information with you about every potential new lover?” And you should establish whether or not you need to meet the person prior to your partner beginning dating them. Is there a don’t ask, don’t tell policy? Is this appropriate?

  1. Consider Making Your Sexual Health a Big Priority

The World Health Organization says that over 1 million people contract a new STI each day. At any given time, there are over 110 million people with an STI in the USA at any given time.

In a consensual nonmonogamous relationship, it’s important for everyone in the partnership to have a sexual health exam before starting this relationship. It’s critical to get tested for the full range of STIs consistently on a 3 to 6 month basis.

And if a new partner is joining the relationship, everyone should get tested within a few weeks. Why? Because when you’re dealing with multiple partners, it’s best to be cautious because you never know when someone might contract an STI and pass it along to the rest of the group.

  1. Constant Communication Is Critical

It can be very difficult and stressful to talk about sex. But you shouldn’t avoid this type of communication altogether. This is especially true in a CNM relationship because communication is critical in this scenario. Remember, you’re dealing with multiple dynamics at any time in this relationship, so honesty and transparency is of the utmost importance if your relationship is going to work.

In fact, prior to beginning a CNM relationship, you should sit down and speak with your partner. During this conversation you can talk about your expectations, learn about their thoughts on certain issues, and discuss positives and potential negatives and get everything out in the open.

Just like any relationship, you’ll only have a successful CNM as long as the partners care for and trust one another. Even better, the more you converse about sex and topics related to sex, you’ll feel much less awkward having these conversations with your partner.

  1. Understand & Acknowledge That Relationship Boundaries Will Shift

In a CNM relationship, you may have agreed to a specific boundary at first, but later on decide that you’d like it to change. In fact, something you envisioned in the beginning before the relationship started is very different now and you aren’t happy. In this case, you need to talk to your partner about shifting boundaries.

Remember, this type of relationship is like going on a journey. It should change and morph into something new, different, and exciting as you add new partners to the mix. Pay attention to your main partner and listen to them. You will learn more about them, yourself, and life throughout this process.

  1. Express Your Desires with Words

We all have certain needs that must be met. We all have certain desires and wants that we need from a relationship. It’s important to express these desires with words to let your partner know what you expect from the relationship, what you want in the bedroom, and much more.

Remember, your partner isn’t a mind reader and communication can become difficult in a CNM. So remember to share your feelings and thoughts and speak them clearly using your words. Otherwise you could end up very unhappy in your relationship for no reason at all.

  1. Realize That It’s Normal to Feel Jealousy in CNM Relationships

It might not be fun, but jealousy is quite common and very normal in a CNM relationship. No one wants to think about their partner having sex with another person or even going on a date with them. It’s natural and normal to feel jealous in this case.

The CNM community is ready to provide support for people who feel this way. There are lots of books on the topic and you can even attend workshops to help you learn how to cope with your feelings.

Even more important, you better share your feelings with your partner. They will help you by providing reassurance when jealousy rears its ugly head, and it will happen.

  1. You Can Hit Pause or Stop a CNM Relationship Whenever You Want

No one is saying you have to stay in a CNM relationship forever. If you explore this type of lifestyle and find that it isn’t working for you, you could always put an end to it because it’s your right.

Many couples experience a relationship boost and a greater sexual connection when they enter into a CNM. Some couples have the opposite experience unfortunately and it doesn’t always work out so well.

Just remember the most important rule of all. It’s absolutely okay to stop this relationship whenever you want. Or if you prefer to slow down or pause it, you can do that as well as you explore your feelings and consider other options.

Filed Under: Relationship

Unusual Ideas for an Exciting First Date

April 24, 2020 by Admin Leave a Comment

Every single relationship is going to begin with a first date. That’s why on the scale of importance, they are critical because they tend to set every potential relationship on the path of determining whether or not the couple will be a great fit.

Believe it or not, the first date will determine if you have chemistry or a spark or connection with the other participant. Or it might help you determine if you should be friends, lovers, or go your separate ways.

Have you recently landed a date? Are you unsure about the best place you should take them? We’ll tell you some great places to go within this article if you’re trying to really impress them while on a first date.

Did she ask you out? That’s okay because women are more comfortable making the first move today and men shouldn’t feel weird about it. Women have more courage, openness, and kindness now more than they ever did before and it’s great.

No matter whether you’re a man, woman, or identify as another gender, we’ve got some awesome first date ideas for you in this article. Please read through them and use these ideas to your advantage.

Today we’ll share information about:

  • Incredible First Date Ideas for Every Occasion
  • 5 Bad Ideas for Potential First Dates
  • The Bottom Line

Let’s get to it without further delay.

Incredible First Date Ideas for Every Occasion

Planning your first date the best way possible comes down to the interests shared between you and your date. You aren’t going to impress anyone by taking them on a boring or unexciting first date. Make sure to plan something that you will both undoubtedly enjoy.

Even better, whatever activity you plan for your date should make it possible to get to know this person. Believe it or not, going to the movies will not give you a chance to chat with your date. If you want to determine if there’s relationship potential there, you need time to talk to this person to get to know them better.

We’d like to share 20 potential incredible date ideas with you today. We’ve categorized them based on different types of first dates.

5 Slow and Romantic First Date Ideas to Make Your Date Swoon

  1. Go on a Picnic

A picnic might not seem like the best idea on the surface, but it’s actually a very good one to help you get to know your new potential partner. But if you’re going on a picnic, you better make sure the weather is perfect that day because it will otherwise ruin the experience. If there’s rain in the forecast, you better come up with a better idea because a picnic first date isn’t the best move in this scenario.

But if you do decide to go on a first date, take your date to a gorgeous park nearby that is known for their picnics. Stop by the farmer’s market or local grocery store to buy the ingredients to prepare a meal.

While picnicking with your new companion, you can really stimulate the conversation to get to know them better. Picking up a nice bottle wine is definitely a good idea as well. It will help you open up and converse better by lowering your inhibitions.

Contrary to popular belief, you don’t have to buy a wooden basket to go on a picnic. Just carry your food and wine in a bag and set it up on a blanket and you will be fine.

To make this date even more special, decide ahead of time to dress fancy for the occasion. It will make the date seem more fun and exciting. And when regular people walk through the park and they see you two dressed up in fancy attire, they’ll get a good laugh and so will you!

  1. Visit a Scenic Point

Do you live in a city with accessible scenic points? You can easily get to know someone better by spending time with them while sightseeing.

During the drive, you’ll have plenty of time to talk to get to know one another better. But once you reach your destination and begin to soak up the beautiful scenery, you’ll experience feelings of peacefulness and calmness that will help you open up even further to your date and vice versa. You may end up having a very deep conversation with this person while sightseeing.

After your experience is through, think about stopping by a local restaurant for a nice meal, a glass of wine, and stimulating conversation before enjoying each other’s company once again on the ride home.

  1. Take a Relaxing Spa Day

As far as first date ideas go, this one isn’t typical, which means it just might be the perfect place to go to experience relaxation and wellness on an exciting spa trip.

A wide range of spas have couples packages, which is great because they’re designed to help you have a wonderful time with your date. Make sure to book activities that you can both enjoy together, so you can talk, relax, and get to know one another in this intimate setting.

This date can go one of two ways. You’ll either become much closer with your date or you’ll feel really weird and awkward. Either way, you’ll know whether or not they’re a good fit by the time the date is through.

  1. Go Shopping at a Flea Market

Are you planning on taking out your date over the weekend? You may want to hit up a local flea market or two because it’s an excellent place to walk around, enjoy the sunshine, and talk to your date as you get to know them. Plus, many flea markets have lots of activities, food, and plenty of people that make them lively hotspots.

To really spice up your afternoon, you can create a list of items that each of you need to find for sale and turn it into a scavenger hunt. But make it so you have to purchase everything for a low price so haggling and budgeting is involved. This will make it more exciting and creative too.

  1. Enjoy Viewing the Stars at Your Local Planetarium

Take a trip to your nearby planetarium and spend the evening stargazing with your date. It’s always nice to take a moment to enjoy the stars and doing that with a date makes it extra special. This is romantic, exhilarating, and something you’ll enjoy sharing with another human being.

5 Adventure-Filled Exciting Dates That Get the Adrenaline Pumping

  1. Enjoy Thrill Rides at the Amusement Park

Are you an adrenaline junkie? How about your date? It’s always fun to go to the amusement park and go on the biggest and scariest roller coasters and other rides. You’ll experience happiness, joy, and the thrill of a lifetime while here.

Even better, you get to conquer your fears with another exciting person in tow. You’ll really get to know one another better and learn a lot about each other as you fly by the seat of your pants at the amusement park.

  1. Act Like Tourists While Exploring Your City

Have you ever taken time to explore your own city? Every city has famous spots for tourism and other important destinations. If you don’t know them, go online to find out the best spots in your city for tourism.

Instead of driving, think about renting a bike for this experience. You’ll enjoy the fresh air with your date and you’ll have plenty of time to get to know one another as you ride back and forth across the city.

This first date is thrilling, stimulating, and even a potential learning experience. You and your date will learn more about your city and get to know it better. When you’re through, you’ll be able to learn the history of tourist attractions and view your city from a more positive light.

  1. Spend the Day Hiking

Do you and your date both enjoy the outdoors? See if he or she would like to go on a hike at a nearby local hotspot? You may want to save this for another time if you’re both beginners. But if you’re into hiking, this is definitely a great place to go to enjoy the fresh air, the wildlife, and the beautiful scenery.

Choose a place that doesn’t require a guide. You do not want a third wheel along for your hike. Who knows? You may even get to delight in a beautiful sunset with your date if you play your cards right.

  1. Spend a Competitive Day Battling Your Date at the Arcade

Do you like feeling like a kid again? A little friendly competition never hurt anyone. And this is especially true at the local arcade. If you can find a retro 80s themed arcade, it’s even better. You can play games like Pac-Man, Frogger, Outrun, Galaga, or other stimulating titles.

Keep score and see who ends up winning the most games by the end of your date. You can even agree on a wager that the loser must commit to if they do not win your friendly competition.

  1. Are You Up for a Road Trip?

Road trips are the perfect first date for free-spirited people that love enjoying the wind in their face as they fly down the open road. So hop in your ride and go for a drive and forget about the destination.

Just see where you end up and make sure you appreciate the stimulating conversation, good food, and great companionship along the way. This spontaneous adventure will make it very easy for you to connect with anyone on a first date.

5 Cute and Fun Dating Ideas for a Whole Lot of Laughs

  1. Go to a Bowling Alley to See If You Can Score a Strike

Take your first day to a bowling alley? Really? It’s actually a pretty good experience because there’s great atmosphere, plenty of people, and it’s also intimate enough to get to know your date.

Try not to be awkward on your date. Give high-fives, don’t shy away from touching and bumping one another, and ultimately have a good time.

  1. Miniature Golf Brings Out the Best in Everyone

Just about every town or city has a miniature golf course nearby. Stop by with your date for an evening of zany miniature golf, ice cream treats, and loads of fun.

It doesn’t matter if you’re an experienced miniature golfer or not because the fun is in getting to know your date and learning how to play this exciting game.

  1. Visit an Indoor Trampoline Park to Jump Around

For some reason, people have convinced themselves that trampoline parks were made just for kids. But this isn’t even close to the truth. They are a whole lot of fun for adults as well.

Locate the nearest trampoline park to your home and make a date. You’ll have a lot of fun while you feel like a kid again. And your date is bound to have a great time too.

  1. Give Rock-climbing a Chance If You’re Brave Enough

Don’t worry if you’ve never climbed a rock wall before. And don’t let your date freak out if he or she hasn’t done it before either. It’s easy to learn under the right supervision and you can even turn it into an amusing and friendly competition. Take bets on who can get to the top of the rock wall first.

  1. Dress Up Wearing Clothes from the 1950s and Meet for Breakfast

Are you trying to avoid clichéd first dates? This suggestion is far from cliché and it’s a great way to get to know someone over a tasty breakfast.

You may not have clothes from the 1950s on hand, so you may have to pick them up from a secondhand store or a costume shop. Just make sure you and your date are on board to dress-up, take photos, make other restaurant patrons laugh, and ultimately have a great time together.

5 Ways to Flex Your Financial Muscle on a Fancy First Date

  1. Impress Your Date with Reservations at an Expensive Restaurant

Having dinner in a fancy restaurant can go either way. Your date will either be very impressed by your money and prestige or it will turn them off.

On the other hand, you’ll get waited on hand and foot at a restaurant like this and sometimes this makes people uncomfortable. So learn about your date and find out if they’re into fancy restaurants and fine dining before scheduling your reservation.

  1. Enjoy a Helicopter Ride through the City

You can schedule a helicopter ride through your city even if you don’t own one. Giving your date a bird’s eye view of the city will make them swoon. They’ll love the wonderful experience and likely have a whole lot of fun. Plus they’ll be impressed by your money and willingness to spend big bucks on a first date.

  1. Experience Wine Tasting at a Local Vineyard or Winery

For a classy first date that might get you out of the friend zone, take your date to a local vineyard or winery in your area. You may have to drive a while to get there, but this provides a good way to get to know your date better through stimulating conversation and anticipation of tasting delectable fine wine.

Not only will this experience be educational as you learn more about fine wines, but you can also experience exquisite flavors and appreciate them more with your attractive date. This experience will be entertaining, gratifying, and also educational for the both of you.

  1. Spent Time Together in an Art Gallery or Museum

Are you trying to appear more intellectual or cultural? A good way to do so is to tour local art galleries and museums. This lends you a measure of prestige while showing your date that there’s more to you than meets the eye.

Do you both enjoy philosophy or art? Are you knowledgeable about this topic and love stimulating conversation around it? If you’re into intellectual experiences along with your date, you’ll definitely create sparks that might ignite a wonderful cerebral relationship like you’ve never had before.

  1. Visit the Opening of an Art Exhibit

To have a fancy and chic date, you can’t go wrong attending the opening of an art exhibit. This is an occasion that you can dress up, enjoy fine wine, and have a great time in a posh and fancy setting. You’ll meet artists, get to schmooze with other intellectual types, and flex your artistic muscle all at the same time.

While here, you can see how well your date mingles with other intellectual types too. So not only will you get to know them better, you’ll also see how they handle social situations at sophisticated events.

5 Inexpensive and Chill Dates That Don’t Cost a Fortune

  1. Take a Walk While the Sun Sets

Enjoying a walk during a sunset is an awesome and inexpensive date idea. If possible, try to walk by the water to watch the sunset over the horizon as you take in the beautiful orange glow. If you can walk along the sandy beach, the experience will be even better. It’s also fun to walk along a pier, a boardwalk, or take a stroll around the lake

  1. Pack a Cooler and Have a Drink or Two Down by the Pier

There’s nothing wrong with packing a cooler full of food and alcohol to take to the local pier. There are usually lots of people around having a good time so you may even meet up with some fun and friendly souls just like yourselves.

Even better, you can hang out at a secluded spot on the beach underneath or near the pier and get to know each other more intimately. Remember to bring plenty of cocktails, some great tasting food, and stimulating conversation and you’ll be fine!

  1. Visit Local Botanical Gardens

Do you live near a city with botanical gardens? Even if it’s a bit of a drive, it’s worth it because they are beautiful, filled with luscious greenery, and free! Most of them usually have a place where you can enjoy a picnic while on a date. And you can look at all of the gorgeous flowers while touring the gardens.

  1. Take a Walk in Nature

Walking is nature is always rousing and refreshing. You can walk along the beach, or through a forest, or enjoy a wonderful mountain trail. Find a natural location that suits you in the vicinity of your home and follow the path. You’ll have a wonderful date in a calm, quiet, and peaceful setting.

  1. Stop by a Used Bookstore

Do you love to read? How about your date? If you are both interested in literature, you should visit a local used bookstore. Sit down for a cup of coffee, some stimulating conversation, and discuss your favorite literary works of fiction while enjoying the pleasure of each other’s company.

5 Bad Ideas for Potential First Dates

  1. The Movies

Not only is this a clichéd first date, it’s also a terrible idea even though so many people go to the movies when going out with someone for the first time. It’s terrible because you have to remain quiet for anywhere from one and a half to three hours, so you have very little chance to get to know your date better.

  1. Concerts

A concert is also a terrible place for a first date. While it may be fun and exciting, it’s also loud and impossible to get to know the other person because the music is blasting right in your eardrums.

  1. A Club

Going to a club on a first date is also a bad idea. Just like going to a concert, it’s loud, there are tons of people around intruding on your time together, and it’s nearly impossible to talk to your date in this setting. Plus the drunk and obnoxious people around you will likely spoil your good time.

  1. Group Dates with Friends

Meeting up with friends during a first date is always a dumb idea. For starters, your date shouldn’t get to know your friends at this stage because they might not be around too long. And it’s also awkward for your date when they’re around your friends because you know everyone and they won’t know anyone.

  1. Netflix and Chill

This may seem innocent enough on the surface but it’s a stupid idea nonetheless. Why? Your date will think you’re bringing them home so you can get laid. They may not appreciate the implications of a Netflix and chill first date even if knocking boots isn’t your intention.

The Bottom Line

Going on a first date and planning a proper outing is critical to your potential relationship. Take time to get to know the person you’re taking out and plan accordingly based on their likes and desires.

Plan this date with confidence every step of the way. Think of things that you like and come up with conversation starters so the night is filled with stimulating and friendly conversations that you’ll both enjoy. This will help eliminate awkward moments and give you and your date plenty to talk about.

Use these excellent first date ideas at your convenience. They will help you get to know your date better and also make it easy for the two of you to have a great time together.

Filed Under: Dating Stats

How to Get Out Of Her Friend Zone

April 22, 2020 by Admin Leave a Comment

Are you trying to make a girl fall for you? Are you sick and tired of being stuck in the friend zone? Are you wondering if you can be more than just friends?

Within this article, you’ll learn about:

  • The Real Truth About the Friend Zone
  • How to Recognize When You’re Entering the Friend Zone
  • The Reasons Why You’ll Get Stuck in the Friend Zone
  • How to Become Her Boyfriend
  • What to Do When She Says No

The Real Truth About the Friend Zone

Why are you having a hard time making her your girlfriend? You’ve done everything right and you’ve gotten much closer to her. But at some point she placed you in the friend zone. People want to believe that this doesn’t exist, but they’d be wrong.

At some point in your life, you have definitely entered the friend zone with a very smart or pretty girl. You wanted to ask her out and prayed she’d say yes, but she only looks at you like she’s your friend. No matter how hard you’ve tried to please her, and no matter how often you are there for her, she isn’t interested in entering a romantic relationship with you.

For many of us, we’ve known a girl for quite some time and we’ve even showered her with affection. We’ve shown her how much we like her, care for her, and more, but she just wants to remain friends.

Guess what? It’s highly likely that she knows you’re into her that way. But she’s pretending like she doesn’t know what’s going on because she wants the two of you to remain friends.

Being trapped in the friend zone can be really hard on a lot of guys because it’s confusing, frustrating, and even painful to deal with. You have to wonder why she can’t recognize that you’re the guy of her dreams as she complains about other guys treating her poorly.

And then she’ll mention something along the lines of, “Why can’t guys treat me the way you do?” And in the back of your mind, you have to wonder why she doesn’t see you as the perfect partner and you bite your tongue because she just doesn’t seem to get it. Instead, you just share a slight smile with her and nod your head in agreement.

Do you know what? This isn’t the end of the road for you with this girl. You can actually make some changes and drag yourself out of the friend zone and into boyfriend material.

Do you think it’s impossible? It certainly isn’t if you can survive the difficulties of the friend zone and escape barely unscathed. You know you’re a good guy and eventually she’s going to see you the same way and realize that you’re perfect boyfriend material.

How to Recognize When You’re Entering the Friend Zone

Are you already scheming to work your way out of the friend zone? Before you begin, make sure that you’re actually within the zone before wasting your time. You have to remember that girls are tricky and they’re often hard to figure out. But signals do exist to let you know whether you’re in or out and it’s possible you could be misinterpreting them.

To help you make your overall determination about whether or not you’re in the friend zone, we’ve shared some common signs with you below to pay attention to. They include the following:

  • She gave you a pet name – it’s cute that she has given you a pet name, and in many relationships this definitely happens. But certain pet names prove that you’re in the friend zone. Does she call you things like “friend”, “buddy”, or “brother?” If so, you’re likely in the friend zone.
  • She loves taking you shopping – what guys like to go shopping? None that I’ve ever met. But if you’re in the friend zone, you will likely go shopping with her because she doesn’t really give you a choice. It’s not like she’s asking you your opinion about the clothes that she’s about to buy. But she wants you there anyway even though you hate it because she decided to make you her shopping buddy. This is a sure sign that you are in the friend zone.
  • She is your favorite wing man – does she like to set you up on dates with other girls? Obviously she doesn’t look at you romantically if she’s trying to set you up with someone else. In fact, if one of her friends had a crush on you she wouldn’t tell you if she actually liked you romantically.
  • She uses you as a shoulder to cry on – is she constantly calling up and crying to you after she breaks up with another guy? Does she contact you immediately after she had a dumb argument with some other dude? If she calls you like this or asks you to meet her for comfort during these difficult times, she considers you her best guy friend. This also means you’re in the friend zone because she’s comfortable sharing vulnerable and intimate moments involving other guys because she looks to you when bad things happen. Crying about another guy to you is a major red flag pointing toward the friend zone.
  • She still treats you like a friend even when she’s drunk – in many friend zone relationships, the girl might share her hidden feelings with you when she gets drunk. She might kiss you or make a move on you and then you’ll finally know how she really feels about you. But if you hang around with her when she’s drunk and she still considers you a friend just like she does when she’s sober, then you’re likely in the friend zone.
  • She’s in a relationship or dating someone else – if she’s hanging around with you but dating other people, she likely considers you a good friend and nothing more. If a girl really likes you, she wouldn’t tell you about her romantic relationships. And if she had plans to date you some day, she wouldn’t fill you in on the gory details of her current flings.

The Reasons Why You’ll Get Stuck in the Friend Zone

Girls have reasons why they might put you into the friend zone or potentially want to hook up with you at some point in the future. In fact, if you believe in old sayings, then you know that there is a reason for everything. This is true of life and it’s also the reason why you will continue to stay locked in the friend zone.

The reasons you’ll stay stuck in the friend zone include:

  • You are always available for her – there’s nothing wrong with being available to people, and this is especially true of a girl that you like. But there is being available and being way too available. This is a mistake that many guys end up making because whenever a girl asks them for a favor or request or an invitation, they always say yes no matter what and drop everything for them. At this stage of the game, you’re likely the guy that she calls to invite to lunch, go shopping or she may even take you to a wedding when she doesn’t have another date. If you constantly remain available to her in this capacity, you will continue to stay in the friend zone. She’ll take you for granted because you’re always there and you’re always available to help her whenever she needs it.
  • You aren’t clear with your intentions – have you been friends with a girl that you like for months or even years? And at this stage of the game, have you let her know your feelings toward her? If you don’t speak up and tell her your intentions, she’s never going to know that you would like to have a romantic or sexual relationship with her. Guys want to believe that their kind gestures and their intentions are obvious. But for some women they just don’t get it so you have to come right out and tell them and be blunt about it. Otherwise your relationship will remain platonic.
  • You feel inadequate for her – do you feel inadequate? Do you feel like you’re just not good enough for her? You may be the one putting yourself in the friend zone just because you do not believe in yourself. Gain self-confidence and understand your value and take a shot and see what happens.
  • You really aren’t her type – let’s face it. In some situations you may be an amazing guy but you just aren’t going to be her type for a physical or romantic relationship. She may like you as a friend, but she’s not into you otherwise. This happens and it’s going to happen from time to time and you have to deal with it. So it’s definitely possible that you’re in the friend zone because she’s just not that into you. It’s not that she doesn’t like you or she thinks you’re ugly or something. She just likes a different type of guy as a romantic partner or someone that she would consider dating. It happens so suck it up and deal with it.
  • You’re afraid of losing her – are you willing to remain in the friend zone because you’ve grown so fond of this girl that you’d do anything to keep her in your life? You may be afraid that she will react poorly to your proposal if you decide to make a romantic advance toward her. If this is the case and you tell her about your feelings toward her, she may decide that she actually likes you too. But on the flip side, she may clam up and stop talking to you if she doesn’t have the same romantic feelings back.

How to Become Her Boyfriend

What do you do to get out of the friend zone and become her boyfriend? You do not have to remain in the friend zone forever. You can take a stand and begin crawling your way out of the pit of friendship that you currently find yourself in.

Stop treating her like a princess and make yourself the main priority.

When a guy falls for a girl and spends a lot of time with her and ends up in the friend zone, he often fails to make himself a top priority. We understand that you’re in love and we get that you want to be by her side whenever she needs you. But don’t forget about the important deadlines in your life and the meetings that you need to attend. You cannot neglect your priorities. You aren’t her hero. You have to live your own life and fix your own problems.

Do not give her special treatment while your life utterly falls apart. She’s going to continue to look at you like her brother anyway. So start saying no to her and don’t do everything she asks and jump at her beck and call. You can still be nice to her because no one says you have to be an idiot toward her. But you have to also draw a line in the sand since you aren’t actually her boyfriend or brother.

Scarcity and unpredictability are the name of the game.

Nobody really likes to be predictable.It’s really boring and you aren’t going to win over a girl if she could predict your every move. You need to make this girl feel excited any time you step foot in the room. She needs to feel a thrill whenever she sees you. Otherwise she’ll be glad that you’re her friend, but she’s never going to experience any major romantic interest toward you. But if you can make her miss you and want to be around you all the time, then you definitely have a real shot at hooking up with her romantically.

The next time she sends you a text, do not reply right away. In fact wait a couple of hours to make her anticipate returning her text. This will get to her ego and she’ll start to get distressed and wonder why you haven’t texted her back just like you always did in the past. This will pull on her heartstrings and really get to her emotionally, where she’ll start wondering why you’re suddenly being distant with her.

Guess what? Girls love drama. They thrive on that stuff. And if you can bring this drama to her life she’s going to like you more. This will keep her off guard and ruin her typical expectations. Now is the time to strike and ask her out. She won’t expect that either. And then you can take her on an adventurous date to an exotic restaurant, or someplace really fun and unexpected.

Show her know that other women want you.

To get out of the friend zone, she needs to start thinking differently about you. She needs to start seeing you as a desirable object of her affection. If other women begin to find you desirable and she sees this, it’s going to change her mind about you too.

To become more desirable, you have to start dating other girls. You have to go on dates and tell her all about them. You have to let her know about your relationships and let her in to see that you’re definitely good boyfriend material. It doesn’t matter if you happen to be in love with this girl because you’re stuck in the friend zone right now and this is the only way you may get out of it.

Has she shown you any interest after you’ve proven that you’re good boyfriend material? If not, then you may need to walk away entirely and find somebody different. Maybe the girl you’re currently dating is the one. But if you can get her jealous enough to see you as the object of her affection, you’ll have a much easier chance at winning her heart.

Become the best version of yourself that you could possibly be.

The best way to win over a girl is to focus on self-improvement. Go to the gym, spice up your wardrobe, start reading more often, and make it a point to try new things. Do whatever you can to build your confidence. A guy will always look much hotter to the opposite sex if he is brimming with self-confidence.

On the flip side, if you are constantly insecure and don’t feel good about yourself, you’ll likely remain in the friend zone. So if she starts telling you about the hot guy that she met when she was out at the club, try not to get jealous. Act cool and even talk up the guy. This reverse psychology always works and it will prove that you’re very confident in yourself. This guy doesn’t intimidate you and you will let her know.

Spice up your friendship.

The only way you’re ever going to win her over as if she becomes sexually attracted to you. You’re obviously already sexually attracted to her, so there’s nothing to worry about in that regard. But you need to focus on splicing up your friendship.

Many guys end up in the friend zone because they do not show the girl their sexuality. And when women think you aren’t interested, they are going to withdraw their sexual attraction.

To spice up your friendship, you can touch her arm, get close while you’re talking to her, grab her hand, and hint that you are interested in her as more than just friends. This will spark a sexual attraction that will take you out of the friend zone and toward boyfriend material.  Maybe you can even start sexting her if you want to get aggressive with it.

Let her know how you feel.

You keep assuming that she knows that you are sexually attracted to her. But honestly, if you haven’t told her outright she probably doesn’t know that you’re into her. So it’s time to man up and actually tell her the truth. Drop hints and let her know that you have a serious interest in her and you’d like to be more than just friends. This might be difficult but it’s the only way to land on her sexual radar.

Stop acting like her best friend.

It will take time to get out of the friend zone, but the best way to begin is to stop acting like her best friend. Try not to remove yourself as her best friend instantly because this will only freak her out and scare her away or make her feel uncomfortable.

Instead, let her know subtly that you would like to be her boyfriend. Send her flowers, tell her how pretty she looks, and then ask her out on a date. This will help get your message across and she’ll know that you’re good boyfriend material and a definite potential suitor.

It’s okay to start flirting with her.

Flirting is the best way to let a girl know that you’re interested in her. And it’s even good when a girl thinks you’re her best friend and she’s got you buried deeply in the friend zone.

As mentioned, complement her as often as possible and do it in a teasing way. Do it confidently and don’t be afraid to take charge. Girls like a man with confidence and they want you to flirt with them. If she responds positively than you’re definitely on your way out of the friend zone.

What to Do When She Says No

Sometimes things just aren’t meant to be. It really sucks to get rejected and you aren’t going to feel great. But you’ll bounce back from heartbreak even if you think you were madly in love with this person.

Don’t worry if you’re sad, angry, or severely disappointed. You can move on quickly if you tried to let her know that you’re interested in her but she just wasn’t into it. It’s time to walk away and begin thinking about going after other girls.

This won’t be easy. But you have to commit to moving on with your life. You cannot stay in the friend zone forever while other relationship opportunities pass you by.

If you’re struggling in this regard, consider the following:

  • Her decision deserves your respect – you don’t have to like her decision but you definitely have to respect it. If she said no then she’s not interested in you that way. Accept it and move on.
  • Accept and acknowledge your feelings – it’s okay to feel terrible when you get rejected. It doesn’t make you less manly to feel hurt or sad. Accept your feelings, acknowledge them, and begin healing from an emotional standpoint.
  • Never blame yourself – just because she doesn’t like you it doesn’t mean that there’s something wrong with you or you should blame yourself. You didn’t fail at anything because she said no. It just wasn’t in the cards. That’s all.
  • Open up to your best friends – instead of dealing with this rejection alone, let your best friends know about it. Tell them how you feel and let them help you cope with the rejection.
  • Move on with your life – yes it hurts to get rejected in love but there are plenty of things that you can focus on to forget about this difficult situation. Surround yourself with friends and other new people and before long you’ll meet another girl that you like even more.
  • Become her friend again – maybe you’ve been missing her in your life even though the relationship didn’t work out. If that’s the case, you could always become her friend if you can handle it. There’s nothing wrong with intentionally putting yourself in the friend zone as long as you realize you’re never getting out of it.

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